Thankfulness

Hey y'all
My life recently has been a great lesson on thankfulness, a lesson that I didn't know I still really had to learn at such a deep level. But here I am, humbled to my core, wishing I wasn't so materialistic. I moved in with my host family yesterday and it was not what I had been expecting. The language barrier and the lack of homey comforts has left me struggling for calm in my heart. I didn't realize how good we really do have it in America.... but I challenge each of you, in every struggle you are going through, concentrate on being thankful. Then see what happens. You might be surprised. Be thankful for warm showers. Be thankful for education that can run you ragged ( because of future benefits and character shaping :) ), for a simple thing such as your ability to speak fluent English, for laundry, for plumbing in general, for the little things in life that you don't even realize go so smoothly and so easily. Be thankful for all the little details that people do in the day to make your life easier at Westmont or even in the community. Be thankful for the beautiful country you were born into. We spend so much time in life wishing, wanting, planning and groping for something more, something we believe is right in front of us, within reach if we really concentrate on obtaining it... but really, look at what is already before you. Don't ignore God's blessings to you that are right in front of your face! Even if you don't live in a 'dream home' by America's standards..... you live in a home and in a country that so many people idolize. Even if you don't have the latest gadget or the same quality car as a neighbor, are you really missing out? Don't play the comparisson game. It kills joy ( as was posted all over Westmont campus at one time). I am not typing this message in a point-my-finger sort of way, I am speaking to my own soul as well. I am being totally convicted. Layed bare. You may be trying to gain comfort and benefits by fighting to gain what you don't have yet, but I am trying to let you all know that comparing and worring about the little things instead of trusting completely in God for those little details and big situations kills life!
I have it so much easier than you all in understanding and desiring thankfulness because I am in a new environment, in a new situation and a different culture that screams at my heart to grow up and be thankful. But you are still in the situation that you are used to. You are still in school and still at home working at the same job, doing the same routine, eating the same food, sleeping in the same bed, loving the same people. You don't have the benefit I do of being directly confronted, but I am going to challenge you directly anyway. Look for new ways to love, to consume life and to conquer the difficult aspects of your everyday life. I want your lives to be affected in some way or another through this trip I am on, whether you read this and know what my deep thoughts consist of, or if you decide to challenge yourself, my goal is accomplished. I really do love sharing my thoughts as it humbles me because they are not always a good set of thoughts to have.... but I am blessed to write to you. Thank you for reading and for sending your love my way through either thought or prayer.
Prayer requests: for the desire to be with my host family, for emotional strength, for health as I may not be getting the best sleep in my new bed for the next couple of months, and for my ability to look at each situation through new eyes. I want the deeper taste of life, I ask to find it by losing selfish thoughts.
Love sent your way from across the globe,
Katie

I found the real Thailand today

Sawasdeeka, (This is a page or two of my journal)

....the first few days in Thailand we were introduced to a side of Thailand that most tourists want to see and spend their time visiting. It is a beautiful country and a great place to visit, but I couldn't figure out what was missing. Thailand is a third world country, but where is the poverty? My group has visited tourist attractions for days, and finally I have found real life here. Life with passion, hurt, intense struggle and love. My own heart is in an intense tumble and struggle. I feel guilt for what I do have and guilt for what I cannot give because I have too little.

I guess I should start with the less serious side of my past couple of days....I have been trying to get a run in everyday while here; it just makes things taste better, smell better, feel better and it is a great way to be with people. I have been doing about 30 minutes a day with a great guy, David, and my good girl friend Emily mainly along with lots of other group members ( I have single handedly started the SST track team, we are getting pretty big :) ). But yesterday I had too much to think about and headed out on my own. And I found it. I found the real deal. My school is on the edge of Chiang Mai and against a mountain range. My run took me up the mountains toward one of the royal family's palaces.
I passed a car crash (no one was hurt), and kept climbing up past house after house of families with such different financial levels. Shacks, housing complexes, monasteries, and decent homes. How can I be spending my time running for pleasure( or pain haha) when some people are struggling to earn money to even live. I have spent countless hours worried about the fact that my occupation of choice won't get me enough money for that car I want or my dream home. How dare my thoughts be consumed by something so petty, so meaningless. No wonder my heart has felt so empty and worthless at home, I am not dwelling on anything with worth. I am not contributing to the community of America and even Westmont in a way that is truly able to make a difference because I dwell on my own silly problems. My worst fear in a day is the fact that someone said something that stung or that i am going to be late to practice and will have to face the team in a little shame :)... but these people worry for a constant flow of food in their home, for sleep, over terrible sickness and over their lost souls.
Another thing. How am I supposed to even make a difference here when I can't speak the language, when I don't have an over abundance of wealth to share or any knowledge of how to feed these people in the physical sense as well as the spiritual sense. At least some can give their skills in medicine, some can give money to others without any worry of running out, and some can just talk with them. I can do none of these options. But I can decide to not dwell on these facts and to continue to be open to God's plan and God's idea for my life. And that is where my hope comes from.
I am going to intern at an HIV positive orphanage while I am here in Thailand. I don't know how this will impact my life, but i know there will be many emotions. I am most excited to finally do something that matters.
I have so much more to write, but not enough time...

God use what I have, let it be enough, let it be something that matters.
Amen...


I hope everyone is doing well in whatever you all are busy with. Maybe by reading this a new breath of air will fill your lungs and you will be inspired to think outside of your struggles for a few moments to consider the hurts of others. I love you all, thanks for the thoughts and prayers you are sending my way
love, Katie

Elephants

Sawasdee-kah!
We hit today running with a quick breakfast and then a 1.5 hour drive to ride elephants in the jungle, raft down a jungle river and eat lunch in an orchid farm. It was so incredible!!!!! It is super fun to go places here as we ride to everything in the back of trucks under camper shells on benches....it is kinda hard to explain, but the gist is that there are no seat belts, the back is open to the road (so if you fall out, it is a bummer) and it is so much more condusive to conversation. I think we should introduce these little buggers to the states. :) oh and I have yet to see a speed limit sign.
It is kind of hard to believe I am going to school right now, oh wait, classes haven't started yet...but when they do (on Monday) I am going to be stressing over memorizing Thai, so a prayer would be appriciated. I wish I could do a better job at explaining my life over here, but there aren't enough minutes and words to do so.
I am attending a college that is as prestigious in Thailand as Stanford or Harvard is to America, which is very awesome and exciting. Chiang Mai University is an honor to attend and we are being honored for coming here to attend.
Right now, life is really good. I am so happy to be here and happy to be a child of God.
Lata' Katie

Here at last!

Thailand is so amazing and my semester is going to be soooo different and good! It is hot and covered in pretty plants that I love to name and I will learn about all the ones I don't know yet :) Whahahaha, my botany vocabulary is going to grow even more, much to some of your horror. It is a beautiful country with weird food, gorgeous people and a lot of life. The trip here was horrendous, but other than that, my first 5 hours here have been great! lol.

I have such a peace and joy and love KNOWING that I am supposed to be here. my group is made up of such nice people who are also anxious to learn and be open, it is nice to be around them. Reminds me of my x-c team. After living the longest night of my life ( about 19hours of darkness) I am up at 3:15pm here, which is 12:15am your time.... just know I am a yittle tiyord (little tired, for those of you who can't read baby talk)
Right now I am so happy and super excited!
Prayer requests: please pray for my peace to continue and give praise for all He has provided for me already. Classes start tomorrow, and I have no idea what to expect, but I am sure I won't be eaten by the prof or anything terrible like that.

Loves

The Eve of Adventure....can hardly wait!!

I am soo excited to be finally going on this trip I have been waiting to embark on for so many years. I actually have wanted to study abroad for a few years, but have only been planning on going to Thailand for about 3 months.... Now knowing I am flying out of the country tomorrow night, I don't know how to feel. All I know is that this is God's plan for me and I am following it, oh man.

Prayer Requests: Please pray that the trip goes smoothly and that our bodies will stay healthy for at least the first few days.

Thanks for all the support everyone has shown so far through the many, many emails I have received and through phone calls.

Much Love,
Katie

Here it is! :)